Helping teenagers develop resilience, confidence, and perseverance is a goal shared by many parents and caregivers. One of the most effective ways to support these qualities is by encouraging a growth mindset. To better understand how parents and caregivers can encourage this mindset during the teen years, we spoke with Dr. Natasha Mills, PsyD, LP, and Dr. Ashley Serrano, PhD, LP, specialists in Psychology at Sanford Health, who shared their insights on why growth mindset matters and how adults can help teens develop it.
What is a Growth Mindset?
Dr. Mills explains. “A growth mindset is the belief that skills and talents grow with practice. It helps a teenager react to challenges as a chance to learn. It encourages a person to ask questions and others for feedback to make improvements.” On the other hand, a fixed mindset results in teenagers often viewing a challenge as a personal limitation which may lead to avoidance or quitting when something is hard.
Why Building a Growth Mindset in Teens Requires a Different Approach
While growth mindset principles apply at every age, the approach to building one changes significantly during adolescence. Dr. Serrano explains, “Psychologist Carol Dweck notes that the approach in building a growth mindset in children versus teenagers differs in the sense that teenagers move from the ‘simple adult-driven reinforcement to more complex identity-driven autonomy’.” The difference lies in how teens think and how they view themselves. She continues, “Younger children tend to think more concretely than teenagers and they rely on literal analogies, whereas the teenager can have more abstract ideas, test hypotheses, and explore neuroplasticity. Younger children focus on concrete outcomes, whereas teenagers often tie their mindset directly to their sense of self.”
Since teenagers are developing a stronger sense of identity, struggles in academics, sports, or social situations can feel deeply personal. This makes growth mindset work both more important and more complex during adolescence.
Why Is It Harder for Teens to Develop a Growth Mindset?
“Building a growth mindset as a teenager is more complicated and nuanced due to social pressures and fears of fitting in. Teenagers may be more likely to avoid situations where they believe they might fail or receive judgement from others,” Dr. Mills highlights. Dr. Serrano adds, “Teens tie their mindset directly to their sense of self and social standing, they may be less willing to take risks to further allow their mindset to grow due to not wanting to be bullied, teased, or be the ‘odd one out’.”
Even if nobody is watching, teenagers undergo the shift where they become hyper-aware of what others think and they often feel a self-conscious pressure of being watched or judged by peers. Understanding these developmental realities can help adults respond with empathy when teens seem hesitant, resistant, or fearful of failure.
The Role of Autonomy in a Teen's Growth Mindset
Adolescence is a time when young people seek greater independence and begin making more of their own decisions. A growth mindset supports this process.
According to Dr. Mills, “When an adolescent believes that they have the ability to figure something challenging out, they will feel more able to make well thought through independent choices.” She further explains, “This also allows them to focus on their own values in situations where peer pressure may occur as they trust their ability to learn and grow."
When teens believe they can handle challenges and learn from mistakes, they often become more confident decision makers. Instead of relying solely on others for direction, they learn to trust their ability to adapt and improve.
Effective Ways to Foster a Growth Mindset in Teens
1. Teach Teens About Neuroplasticity
One of the most effective ways to encourage a growth mindset is by helping teens understand how the brain learns.
Dr. Mills notes, “I will teach teenagers about the concept of neuroplasticity and how a person's brain makes changes based on new experiences and repetition.”
Similarly, Dr. Serrano highlights, “I will also discuss neuroplasticity and how our brain changes with each experience we take on. The more we do something, the more likely our brain will hold onto it.”
Learning that the brain can change and adapt helps teens understand that abilities are not fixed. Skills improve through repeated effort and practice.
2. Focus on Growth and Learning
Parents and caregivers can regularly discuss examples of personal growth, improvement, and perseverance. Continuing to have conversations around how others and the child have improved their results, developed talents, and grown skills can help them notice the process needed for positive changes. Highlighting progress, rather than perfection, helps teens recognize that growth happens over time.
3. Reframe Mistakes as Learning Opportunities
Mistakes are often viewed negatively, especially during adolescence. However, reframing and helping others see mistakes as an opportunity for learning verses a failure is helpful. When adults treat mistakes as valuable feedback rather than disasters, teens are more willing to take healthy risks and try again after setbacks.
4. Encourage Teaching and Skill Mastery
An effective way to reinforce learning is to have teens teach others.
Dr. Serrano shares, “During our sessions, we practice skills repeatedly, not just for one time success, but for repeated success. When we have repeated success, I will then often have the teen teach their parent, guardian, or myself the skill as we know that teaching others can also increase confidence and success.”
5. Use Relatable Metaphors
Teens often benefit from concepts that make learning feel relevant and understandable.
Dr. Serrano says, “I like to use the metaphor that I learned from Dr. Liz Angoff regarding highways in the brain.” She explains that some highways are already well-paved because they represent areas of strength, while others are still under construction and require more practice and effort to build. “For instance, their video game highway is a strength and already paved. They can use this highway with few bumps and detours. Other highways, such as the math highway or reading highway or the sports highway might still be under construction so we have to spend more time there to keep building it. There might be detours and bumps in the road, but the more time we spend building the highway, the more it will be built,” she explains.
This metaphor helps teens understand that developing a new skill takes time and that difficulties are often a natural part of the learning process.
How to Respond When Your Teen Wants to Give Up
1. The Power of Yet
Every teen encounters setbacks. What matters most is how adults respond in those moments.
Dr. Mills recommends first seeking to understand the reason behind the discouragement. She suggests, “A parent can ask questions to determine why their child wants to give up.”
If they find out it is because of a fixed mindset, such as a belief that they have failed or will continue to be bad at it, an adult can help reframe these beliefs.
One simple but powerful strategy is adding the word "yet."
As Dr. Mills explains, “Adding the word yet can be a powerful reminder that while you don't have a skill well developed yet, it can still be worked on.”
2. Praise Effort, Not Just Outcomes
Both Dr. Mills and Dr. Serrano emphasize the importance of recognizing effort and persistence. Dr. Mills advises, “Praising the effort a person puts in verses the end product also can be a powerful tool.”
When caregivers notice hard work, practice, and determination rather than only grades or achievements, teens learn that growth matters more than perfection.
3. Look for Additional Support When Needed
A growth mindset does not mean pushing through every challenge alone. It also means seeking resources, support, and new strategies when necessary. Dr. Serrano explains, “When we see our teens studying for hours on end and staying up late, but they earn a low grade on their test, this can give us a lot of information. For the teen, they might feel that no matter how much they study, they can’t pass so what’s the point. For the adult, we can recognize that we might need to help with study strategies that work best for the teen or obtain the extra adult help.”
A Common Growth Mindset Mistake Caregivers Make
“Parents sometimes forget the power of modeling through their own experiences,” says Dr. Mills. She encourages adults to openly share their own growth journeys. She continues, “Having a parent talk about something that is hard for them, that they are currently working on to improve, and allowing their child to see improvements over time that they have made can be a powerful tool.” When a parent models a fixed mindset, such as ‘I was poor at math too and ended up failing,’ can be validating and normalizing, but it is not demonstrating the growth mindset that may be needed to encourage the individual to keep working on building math skills.
Dr. Serrano echoes this idea, “Adults get frustrated all the time when they do not get something as quickly as we expect. So, modeling our frustration and how we work through frustration can be helpful.”
When teens see adults embracing challenges, learning from mistakes, and continuing despite frustration, they gain a real-life example of what a growth mindset looks like.
Building a growth mindset in teens is not about guaranteeing success. It is about helping them understand that abilities can be developed through effort, learning, and persistence. By teaching the value of neuroplasticity, encouraging resilience, and responding supportively to setbacks, parents and educators can help teens build lasting confidence. Over time, these lessons empower young people to face challenges with courage, embrace mistakes as opportunities to learn, and believe that growth is always possible.
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